Randomly IMing about French (as opposed to simply doing my homework)

5:42pmSharon
They keep telling me that due to the Norman invasion of England in 1066 (which, by the way, I am very passionate about) English and French have like 60% of everything in common (there's a fancy word for it that I can't remember) Apparently though, the French have a severe cultural (not congenital) speech impediment, which gradually evolved away once they crossed the channel- but their brothers left behind in Normandy were less fortunate, hence I have to suffer all of this frustration now.

5:43pmMelody
lol

5:43pmSharon
You seem to take this tragedy very lightly Melody

5:44pmMelody
yes. yes i do

5:44pmSharon
I might have expected as much.

5:45pmMelody
what is that supposed to imply?

5:46pmSharon
Think of the consternation when Sir Wilfred Lie-a-bed went home for the fifty year class reunion, and found that he couldn't understand a word his fellow squire of days gone by, Hairuid Stoneslinger was saying?

The tower of Babel pales in comparison

5:47pmMelody
LOL you are so funny

5:49pmSharon
And perhaps Hairuid was trying to explain that Lord Drizzlecask had died leaving him a fortune, but, in befuddlement, Wilfred thought he was offering him another tankard of ale... You have to FEEL these things, Melody, use your imagination- make history come alive! :-)

5:49pmMelody
my heart is breaking for them.

5:49pmSharon
I knew that given a little perspective you would begin to see things properly

Your tender heart does ye credit, lass.

5:51pmSharon
Twas a muckle sore thing, and the grief of it still rankles. What was the result of all this confusion? Wilfred and Hairuid's grandsons chopping each other to fragments at Waterloo, if not sooner! Little things add up.

5:52pmMelody
oh fun

5:52pmSharon
And all because the French can't spell, and consequently become desperately confused in their pronunciation. Honestly, where but in France would they assume that parles and parle should sound the same way? And where else would they try to write 'beautiful' and end up with beaux, and, looking it over say, 'ummm, I think it says 'bo'. Only, the e, the a, the u, and the x are silent. And the o is invisible. The French are entirely too enamoured of their own interpretation of dipthongs.

5:52pmMelody
lol

5:52pmSharon
Not to mention the dark day when some enterprising young grammarian came along and said: "No, simply to say 'beaux' would be misleading and cause complications! We must distinguish between the singular and the plural! I know- for singular nouns, we will drop the silent 'x' from the end of 'beaux' which we pronounce 'bo', and continue to pronounce it 'bo' in both cases. That way, no one will get confused!" Whoever he was, I hope he got a medal.

5:52pmSharon
I'm sorry. I become prone to impassioned monologues when I get tired. :-)

5:56pmMelody
lol

i enjoy them

5:56pmSharon
Which is one of many reasons we are friends! :-)

5:57pmMelody
yay!

6:01pmSharon
i know!